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    Cars and Sharks – It Must be Summer at the Movies

    It’s so summer right now. Animated car racing, shark attacks, plus a killer line up for Film Festival of Columbus and a super fun SciFi Sleepover at Gateway Film Center. Will any of it knock Wonder Woman out of the top spot? Dude, I wouldn’t. She’s a total badass.

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    Loads of ways to sit in comfy, air conditioned darkness and binge drink Diet Coke. I love summer!

    Cars 3

    As great as the Disney/Pixar lineup is -and it’s pretty great- the Cars franchise sits low in the batting order. Cars 3 rebounds nicely, but still can’t match the meaningful substance of Pixar’s best.

    We catch up with legendary race car Lightning McQueen (voiced by Owen Wilson) in a changing sports world. Suddenly, a new generation of “NextGen” cars, led by rookie sensation Jackson Storm (Armie Hammer), is taking over.  New team owner Mr. Sterling (Nathan Fillion) brings in a young trainer named Cruz (Cristela Alonzo) to get McQueen adapted to the new technology, but her “senior project” only fuels the feeling that the legend should stay in the garage for good.

    Animation vet Brian Fee helms his first feature as director/co-writer with Cars 3, and while the visual style is characteristically luscious, the story that he’s telling never quite rises above the pleasantries of showing kids some talking cars and introducing a new line of tie-in merchandise.

    Alas, Cars 3 drives on by, satisfied with “believe in yourself” mantras that are greeting card ready, and a first-place trophy for the cheerfully harmless.

    Grade: B-

    47 Meters Down

    Lisa (Mandy Moore) and Kate (Claire Holt) are sisters on vacation in Mexico. Lisa, the play-it-safe older sister, is nursing a heartbreak, which loose cannon Kate hopes to heal via the worst imaginable decisions. Like a shark cage expedition.

    Cage goes in the water.

    Sharks in the water.

    Our shark.

    Because tourists are stupid.

    Something goes wrong and the girls and their cage drop to the sea floor, a dangerous 47 meters down. They have little oxygen, and they’re surrounded by sharks. How will they survive?

    Last year’s surprise hit The Shallows basically created the Girl Power Shark Movie, and director Johannes Roberts, with co-scripter Ernest Riera, end up playing out a far less empowering tale. Roberts’s background is horror, though, so he does know how to deliver some visceral action now and again.

    Atmosphere is Roberts’s talent, and he creates a good deal of it. Aided by impressive CGI, the sisters’ plight on the ocean floor is often nearly as breathless for the audience as it is for the characters.

    Dialog, on the other hand, is definitely a weaker point. Pair the banalities of the conversations, the contrivances that put the characters where they are, and a first act weighed down with cartoonishly ridiculous choices, and the cool shark sequences have a lot to overcome.

    For a mindless, squirmy summer shark fest, though, it’s a fun time waster.

    Grade: B-

    Also Opening in Columbus:
    All Eyez on Me (R)
    The Book of Henry (PG-13)
    Rough Night (R)

    Reviews with help from George Wolf.

    Read more from Hope at MADDWOLF and listen to her horror movie podcast, FRIGHT CLUB.

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    Hope Madden
    Hope Maddenhttps://columbusunderground.com
    Hope Madden is a freelance contributor on Columbus Underground who covers the independent film scene, writes film reviews and previews film events.
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