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Zombie Attack Threat Index

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This topic contains 59 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by  Snarf 4 years, 6 months ago.

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  • #76249

    Snarf
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    In the interest of public safety, I have created the Zombie Attack Threat Index (ZATI). This is a five level, color-coded scale which indicates the current Zombie attack threat risk.

    Green – No fuckin’ Zombies around to eat your brains. But don’t get complacent!

    Blue – The undead are slightly restless but still pretty fuckin’ dead. Stay away from cemetaries, just to be sure.

    Yellow – Zombies are stirring from their eternal slumber so you’d better make sure your Zombie-killing weapons are available so you can kill the fuckers.

    Orange – Holy crap, Zombies could attack at any fuckin’ time! Have your weapons ready and get ready to escape to your Zombie-proof bunker. You do have a bunker, right?

    Red – We’re fucked. Zombies are everywhere and eating brains with wild abandon. It’s chaos out there. Look out! There’s one right behind you!

    I will regularly monitor the Zombie attack threat and notify CU Members appropriately. Please check my avatar description for the current threat level.

    #271433
    sjf
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    This reminds me of a Patton Oswalt bit where he was reading a porn email and commented that the author had managed to destroy the allure of the f-word.

    #271434
    Walker Evans
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    #271435

    Snarf
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    Jesus Fucking Christ dude, lighten up.

    #271436

    michaelcoyote
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    #271437

    Snarf
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    hahaha

    #271438
    Alex Silbajoris
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    I was wondering recently, what is the “National Threat Advisory” these days, anyway? According to the DHS page, it’s “Elevated” but you never hear about it anymore.

    #271439
    Walker Evans
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    Snarf wrote >>
    Jesus Fucking Christ dude, lighten up.

    I’m light. ;) Just sharing a link.

    #271440
    rus
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    alexs wrote >>
    I was wondering recently, what is the “National Threat Advisory” these days, anyway? According to the DHS page, it’s “Elevated” but you never hear about it anymore.

    DHS?

    Dead Hooker Storage?

    Might explain where zombies come from…

    #271441
    HeySquare
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    Snarf wrote >>
    Jesus Fucking Christ dude, lighten up.

    Snarf-
    Taking someone else’s written words and claiming them as your own is plagarism. If you had even prefaced with: “Hey, thought this was funny” it wouldn’t matter, since we’d all know that it came from somewhere else. But you didn’t.

    And now… you’re getting all snarky because you tried to play off someone else’s words, and you got called on it?

    Man up, and let it go.

    #271442

    Snarf
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    HeySquare wrote >>

    Snarf wrote >>
    Jesus Fucking Christ dude, lighten up.

    Snarf-
    Taking someone else’s written words and claiming them as your own is plagarism. If you had even prefaced with: “Hey, thought this was funny” it wouldn’t matter, since we’d all know that it came from somewhere else. But you didn’t.
    And now… you’re getting all snarky because you tried to play off someone else’s words, and you got called on it?
    Man up, and let it go.

    Plagiarism? It’s the fucking internet. It should have simply been assumed to not be original writing and taken to be funny internet fodder, no “hey thought this was funny” necessary. Don’t be so uptight (words that many CU members should heed these days.)

    Also, man up and let it go? You’re giving walker/michaelcoyote the reach around here.

    #271443
    Jim Lauwers
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    Snarf wrote >>
    It’s the fucking internet. It should have simply been assumed to not be original writing

    I write original things. On the internet, even. Fuck you.

    #271444
    Cookie
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    It’s funny that the one person losing his shit here is telling everybody else to lighten up.

    #271445

    Snarf
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    JimL2 wrote >>

    Snarf wrote >>
    It’s the fucking internet. It should have simply been assumed to not be original writing

    I write original things. On the internet, even. Fuck you.

    JimL2, you have just won the Walker/michaelcoyote/HeySquare soggy cookie.

    Eat up, yum yum!

    #271446

    Snarf
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    Cookie wrote >>
    It’s funny that the one person losing his shit here is telling everybody else to lighten up.

    Cookie, piling on per usual, I was getting impatient.

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